This one takes me back to my Gay Bar period.... places like The Shaggy Horse.
My pal Jack and I were in one of those one night, and before we went inside, Jack warned me to stay close, because the place was famous for predatory young guys who tried to get you outside, where they could grab your wallet and take off with it, while you're expecting a much different outcome.
All was well, until one of the band recognized my pal, and invited him on stage to sit in with them for a set. So I'm now by myself, standing at a tall table near the stage, enjoying my drink, and watching the guys dancing and enjoying themselves. Suddenly, I feel this hand on my thigh, slowly but relentlessly rising toward 'ground zero'. Without thinking, (my favorite mode!) I panicked, cupped my hands to my mouth, and yelled above the music "Jack! Help! I'm being molested!"
It was like somebody had flipped a switch in there. Everything came to a screeching halt - the dancing, the band's music, the guys at the bar, everything! There was about twenty seconds of dead silence, followed by a roar of laughter that almost caused some to fall off their chairs, or double over on the dance floor. The kid whose hand had been on my thigh had vanished, and the Manager came over, with a big smile, saying "That's the best opening line I've heard all month! The drinks are on the house for the rest of the night - enjoy yourself!"
My pal Jack came back from the stage, and said "Thanks for getting me out of that gig - it's my night off, and I don't want to be working anyway - let's have some fun!" We did, and when I drove him home, we shared a very nice kiss under a big old apple tree in bloom in his back yard, while his lady friend peeked out the kitchen window and watched us. When we went inside, she was smiling and said, "I know what you guys have been doing..." and we all had a good laugh about it. She enjoyed the story of how I got Jack off the stage and got us some free drinks. - Those were the days, my friend.... ( and the nights weren't bad either!)
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